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"A word after a word after a word is power."
- Margaret Atwood



My 2025 Reading List
It’s officially National Book Week and what a better way to commemorate it than to share my long-awaited 2025 Reading List 😁 You are probably thinking, “Ma’am 2025? 2026 is almost done!” I know. See last year was a challenging one for me on many levels. My routine and new demands of life uprooted my ability to do things that grounded me. One part that got disrupted was my reading and writing habits. I did not attain my goals to read more books and to write often. Book Club g

Refilwe
2 days ago4 min read


Gemima Phalane on reinvention, risk and why you should bet on yourself
We've heard many stories about people who go through a journey of reinvention after a certain age. The adage, "life begins at 40" has for years been the benchmark for many people to actually start LIVING LIFE. But Gemima's story shows us that we do not have to wait for a particular age to live purposefully. The journey starts with intentional steps that we take each day to build towards a meaningful life. That in itself does not mean we should wait for a meaningful life to kn

Refilwe
Aug 277 min read


Lebo Grass: breaking curses, building wealth and becoming a new version of herself
From homeless to multi-lets, a woman’s journey to redefining her bloodline There are many things we come across daily on social media but one encounter with a post never really prepared me for the journey I’d be on. In this digital age, there are many people who show up online for a show whilst others are intentionally curating how they want to be perceived. Others, who I am always drawn to are the ones that show up authentically. It’s the ones who do not pretend to be someth

Refilwe
Aug 155 min read


What driving on the highway has been teaching me about life
For the longest time, I avoided driving on the highway. Those familiar with the N1 between Johannesburg and Pretoria know that the commute there isn’t for the faint-hearted, especially during peak time. So I worked in Pretoria, closer to home because the thought of navigating busy highways every day felt overwhelming. It wasn't exactly fear, but it was close enough. I imagined arriving at my destination exhausted before my day had even begun. So I stuck with what felt safer a

Refilwe
Jul 316 min read


The Netflix Effect on African stories and why it feels personal
What if the future of African storytelling doesn’t begin with turning a page, but with pressing play? From intimate industry conversations to deeply personal reflections, this piece explores how the Netflix Effect is transforming African stories, making them more visible, more accessible and for many young creators, finally within reach.

Refilwe
Jun 45 min read


The year that didn’t stick to the plan (and what it gave me instead)
Looking back at the pages of my life in the past year, I realise that honouring each season we find ourselves in with intentional presence and determination makes a world of a difference. It shouldn’t just be clarity that moves us,we should be moved by faith, hope and the belief that the journey continues. Like the popular phrase says, “trust the process”. So, as life continues in this new year, instead of repelling and armouring up, lean in.

Refilwe
May 35 min read


Twinkle Little Star
It’s a Saturday, 15h33 and I’m on a flight to Sao Paolo, Brazil - a 10-hour connecting flight from Cape Town (connected from Johannesburg). I’m sitting in an aisle seat, jamming to Elaine via the inflight entertainment channel whilst a little baby next to me is unsettled. Both parents are trying to calm him down but his cries are warranted. The flight is long and I can imagine, uncomfortable for him. The mom continually sings “twinkle twinkle little star”, with the hope to so

Refilwe
Dec 23, 20253 min read


Is the expression of exhaustion a sign of ungratefulness?
Some weeks back someone I know posted a quote that said: “how nice is it to be exhausted from the things we prayed for.” So when I shared about how exhausted I was about work trips I was scheduled to take, my sisters’ reminder that I prayed for all this hit me like a ton of ice. I sobered up quickly and remembered… See, growing up, one of my favourite past times was magazine reading – something my mom passed on to me. I enjoyed the features, testing my knowledge with crosswor

Refilwe
Dec 9, 20253 min read


Grieving again through conversations and someone else’s loss
One thing I’ve come to learn is that grief is not a linear journey. It doesn’t follow a schedule and it certainly doesn’t fold neatly. For many, the pain of loss softens over time but it never truly disappears. It lingers quietly, tucked away in the corners of our hearts until something or someone brings it back, most times, unintentionally. One of the most unexpected triggers for this resurgence is witnessing someone else’s grief or conversations around holiday plans. When s

Refilwe
Nov 28, 20253 min read


Parenting: the gift and its challenges
Parenting is a profound gift that many of us are blessed to receive at some stage in our lives. It is a journey filled with unexpected twists, turns and challenges, yet it remains a gift that continues to enrich us in unique and meaningful ways. Becoming a parent is a life-changing experience. It demands an unwavering commitment to nurturing and guiding our children, shaping their characters and ensuring their well-being. The role of a parent requires us to dedicate our time

Refilwe
Nov 17, 20253 min read
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Twinkle Little Star
It’s a Saturday, 15h33 and I’m on a flight to Sao Paolo, Brazil - a 10-hour connecting flight from Cape Town (connected from Johannesburg). I’m sitting in an aisle seat, jamming to Elaine via the inflight entertainment channel whilst a little baby next to me is unsettled. Both parents are trying to calm him down but his cries are warranted. The flight is long and I can imagine, uncomfortable for him. The mom continually sings “twinkle twinkle little star”, with the hope to so

Refilwe
Dec 23, 20253 min read


Dancing to the same tune in marriage
A deep passion for witnessing and experiencing solid family structures exist in our society has long been entrenched in my heart. This...

Refilwe
Feb 20, 20254 min read


Reasons why you should screw it and just do it: lessons from my July reads
Greatest lessons from my July reads

Refilwe
Jul 21, 20243 min read


Gratitude amidst a mayday season
9 years ago on this day, 1 May, my family and I were getting ready to take a dreadful trip to the homelands to go bury my darling mother....

Refilwe
May 1, 20244 min read


Navigating life through the lens of loss: things I’m relearning about life
Navigating life through the lens of loss.

Refilwe
Feb 25, 20243 min read


Valentine's Day: Is it a Celebration of Love or an all-sorts Contest?
Since the beginning of February, Bontle has been all talk about Valentine’s Day and who is whose valentines at school, etc. During these...

Refilwe
Feb 19, 20244 min read


Sin not, oh perfect one
This one is for Christians! Something has been gnawing at me for some time now. When TD Jakes trended regarding his association with P...

Refilwe
Jan 28, 20243 min read


4 things 2023 taught me
The end of the year and the beginning of a new one always presents an opportunity to reflect. For the past three years, I’ve gotten into...

Refilwe
Jan 5, 20244 min read


Checklist for perfect motherhood
√ Spotless home √ Children adhere to sleep times √ Always on time for school and events √ Children always “well-mannered” √ Hearty...

Refilwe
Nov 22, 20224 min read


Growing pains
Growing up I always felt like something was missing. If it wasn’t a close-knit, happy family, creating joyful memories together it was me...

Refilwe
Oct 19, 20224 min read


Spiritual Detox Programme Reflections
Ever had a yearning to feel grounded, but you find yourself soaring on unhelpful activities that further impact negatively on your soul?

Refilwe
Oct 9, 20226 min read


Extraordinary living for ordinary peeps
We are all ordinary people with extraordinary capabilities. BUT, unless you believe in your extraordinary capabilities ...

Refilwe
May 23, 20222 min read


Make things happen
Do you feel like life is passing you by? Here are some tips on making things happen!

Refilwe
Mar 31, 20224 min read


82 days later…
The start of a new year has always brought with it great excitement, in anticipation of what lies ahead. But this year was different for...

Refilwe
Mar 23, 20224 min read


March Self-Care Guide
Hello March A brand new month - the last month of quarter one - is upon us. I don’t know if it’s just me but it seems time moves really...

Refilwe
Mar 3, 20225 min read


Growing pains
When we set goals, we do so from a deep yearning of wanting to be more than what we are presently.

Refilwe
Feb 9, 20223 min read


Why are you so assumptious?
An assumptious person makes a lot of assumptions, period. The Oxford Dictionary defines assumptions as: “a thing that is accepted as true...

Refilwe
Jan 10, 20223 min read


Sizing up God
Most times it is because we are afraid that we are just big dreamers but nothing will really come to fruition. We label our dreams as ...

Refilwe
Dec 9, 20213 min read


6 reminders for the new season
YES! Finally! Spring has sprung and we are here, waiting on the flowers to bloom. But don't just wait for the flowers to bloom, join in...

Refilwe
Sep 8, 20212 min read
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