What driving on the highway has been teaching me about life

For the longest time, I avoided driving on the highway. Those familiar with the N1 between Johannesburg and Pretoria know that the commute there isn’t for the faint-hearted, especially during peak time. So I worked in Pretoria, closer to home because the thought of navigating busy highways every day felt overwhelming. It wasn't exactly fear, but it was close enough. I imagined arriving at my destination exhausted before my day had even begun. So I stuck with what felt safer and more familiar.

Then life happened, thrusting me into the growth dimension.

---

Last year, I started a new job in Johannesburg and suddenly highway driving was no longer optional. Commuting became part of my daily routine. At first, the idea of spending hours a week in traffic felt draining and overwhelming. But over time, I found my rhythm. Listen, I didn’t have a choice because it was an “adapt or die” kind of situation. Ok, I know that’s exaggerated but this is a safe space, right? 😊

Anyway, today I want to share some of the lessons I’ve learned through observing how traffic flows on the highway, driver behaviour and all of the jazz.

1. The fast lane isn't always faster

One of the first things I've noticed is that being in the fast lane doesn't always get you to your destination sooner. There have been countless occasions where I've stayed in the fast lane, convinced it was the quickest route, only to watch the so-called slower lanes move much faster. Sometimes the lane you'd least expect becomes the one that flows effortlessly while everyone else sits in frustration, on the “fast” lane.

Life can be exactly the same. There’s never a guarantee that the fast lane (when things are moving at an accelerated speed for you), will equate to you reaching your destination much quicker. Yes, sometimes you will get to your destination earlier than anticipated because you would've capitalised on time and that would've worked in your favour. However, we need to appreciate that our journeys are different. I believe this kind of appreciation propels us to embrace the unique journey we are on. This can be hard and challenging at times because we tend to compare our progress.

But remember, just because someone's path appears faster (read easier) doesn't mean they're getting somewhere better – check what’s happening in the Madlanga Commission. It certainly doesn't mean you're behind. Growth happens at different speeds for all of us and sometimes the lane you're in is exactly where you need to be.

Let this lesson be a reminder to honour the season you are in, i.e. stay in your lane. As you navigate it all, keep your eyes focused on what matters so you can step fully into who God has created you to become.

The goal isn't to race everyone else but to keep moving forward with intention.

2. Constantly changing lanes can slow you down

Another lesson I've learned is that moving between lanes all the time doesn't necessarily save time. In fact, it often does the opposite. I rely heavily on my GPS during my daily commute butI’ve noticed something interesting…

On the days when I'm constantly weaving between lanes, chasing every little gap I see, I rarely arrive any earlier. If anything, I get to my destination more stressed, fatigued and sometimes even later than expected.

The same can happen in life.

Don’t get me wrong, I’m not advocating for staying in one place forever unnecessarily. If something no longer serves you, there may come a time when you need to move. But constantly jumping from one thing to the next can rob us of the opportunity to build depth, resilience and character.

Sometimes we're so busy chasing the next “big” opportunity that we never stay anywhere long enough to learn the lessons that season was designed to teach us. Remember that growth requires commitment and not everything worthwhile happens quickly.

3. Perspective changes everything

Traffic is traffic and days are never the same. Some days there are multiple accidents and other days roadworks appear out of nowhere. Some mornings your ETA changes every five minutes and all you want to do is scream into your steering wheel. I do this sometimes and also get short with people (read road rage) – not my proudest moments but thou shalt not judge.

Anyway, in my calm moments, I've realised that while I can't always control the traffic, I can control how I use the time. My commute is almost an hour on most days. That's two hours every day that could either drain me or develop me. A choice to be made here…

Some days I drive in complete silence. No music. No radio. Just stillness. I’ve actually come to enjoy some traffic white noise on occasion. Other days I need energy, something to pump me up, so I play my favourite songs and sing along unapologetically. When I feel creative and playful, I create jingles or review copy on the billboards out loud. Sometimes I listen to podcasts for some wholesome conversations and to learn something new. Other days I use the time to call friends and family members I haven't spoken to in a while.

I relish in these moments especially the conversations I have with my loved ones. Because I’ve got time, our conversations are often deeper than the rushed "How are you?" exchanges we fit into busy schedules. Of late, I’ve become really grateful for the N1 as it gives me space to truly connect.

I believe the shift happened when I realised that the commute doesn't have to be dead time. It can be thinking time, learning time, healing time, connection time or simply, a time to create. As a matter of fact, this very blog was born during one of those drives. I used my Voice Memo app to record all of this! Cool, right?

4. Not every gap is an opportunity

One thing every highway driver understands is the temptation of a gap. You see an opening in another lane and immediately think, "That's my chance to get ahead." Sometimes it is and sometimes it isn't.

I've changed lanes because I saw what looked like the perfect opportunity, only to watch that lane slow to a crawl while the lane I'd just left continued moving effortlessly. Many times this thought crosses my mind, “girl, where were you going?”

Life is also like this. It has a way of presenting gaps that look promising: a new opportunity, a new project, a new relationship or a new commitment. When a gap opens, we see that space as an opportunity to progress and get further on much quicker but sometimes those spaces aren't for us. The truth is that, not every open door is meant for us.

Just because something is available doesn't mean it's aligned.

Not every opportunity deserves a yes. Sometimes I say yes to things I should be saying no to. I’m sure I’m not alone in this. So this lesson has reminded me to be more discerning, more prayerful and less impulsive. Some opportunities are blessings whilst others are distractions dressed up as progress.

Wisdom is knowing the difference. #LordHelpUs

5. There is always a gap to be explored

Now, before you accuse me of contradicting myself, here's the other side of the lesson. While not every gap is meant for us, there is almost always a gap somewhere.

The off-ramp I take to work is notorious for traffic. Some drivers join the queue far back and wait patiently. Others merge closer to the off-ramp when an opportunity presents itself. Sometimes I do that too when I don’t want to wait for too long. Most times, somebody is always chilling, driving extra slow and having this really big gap that you can quickly slide into safely.

What I've learned is that, more often than not, when you go looking for an opportunity, you will find it. Someone will create space - whether intentionally or unintentionally, there will be a chance, a possibility.

There will be seasons where doors seem closed and opportunities seem scarce. Yet somehow, when you're clear about where you're going and intentional about your actions, opportunities often appear even in spaces where you least expect it.

Will it always work out? No, because sometimes you will miss the gap. Other times, you get the timing wrong. Like the many times when I've had to stand on the sidelines indicating and waiting for an opportunity to join my offramp. On such days, I wait patiently hoping for the kindness of a good Samaritan to let me in. The wonderful thing is that even those moments teach humility because they remind us that we won't always get it right and that's okay.

There is grace in being human.

The greatest lesson commuting on the N1 has taught me is that there is wisdom hidden in our everyday experiences. But because we're often so busy rushing through life, we miss what our circumstances are trying to teach us. We become consumed by deadlines, responsibilities, expectations and endless to-do lists forgetting that some of life's most profound lessons arrive in ordinary moments.

So the main question I have for you, will you accept the invitation to pay attention and be more present?

Yes, the destination matters but sometimes the journey has far more to teach us than we realise.