New year, same old. Same old. Right? Not entirely!
As the year progresses, holidays over with back to school and work pressures mounting, I realise that I am in a new year but the deliverables required from me have not changed.
Like many, I wear a lot of hats and with each task and the next thing to do, some days I feel like I am going crazy. Honestly, between work, raising an ambitious young girl, being a wife, being a sister, a mentor, a coach, a podcaster and fulfilling my foundation work, I tend to feel like I am floating through life, stuck in a hamster wheel and not really touching the ground.
The many hats I wear fulfil me but can it can get daunting at times. So this year, I decided to theme my year: “The year of balance”. This is especially important to me because I am at a stage in my life where I feel like I need to pause and breathe. I need to feel that I am living a life that is balanced and steady. I was saying to my husband the other day that this year I want to feel my feet touching the ground. He then asked me what that meant for me and I’ve categorised what I resolved under these pillars. I hope they are helpful to you too.
Be present: Because we wear many hats, we can get caught up in hamster-wheel kind of lifestyle which leaves us breathless, overwhelmed and depleted. Being present means that you are mindful of the things you do because when you are engaged in them, you are focused sorely on what your are doing. If you are playing with your child for example, you are fully engrossed in the play time and you aren’t looking at clock, thinking about the next thing you have to be doing (I call this clock-watch parenting). Being present may require scaling down on the things you have on your to-do list or to-attend list.
Tip: If you are easily distracted, remove distractions in close range of what you are doing. Focus on being in the moment and enjoying what it has to offer you.
Saying NO: No is a full sentence. If you didn’t know, now you know. Saying no without being guilt-ridden
is something I want to continue doing this year. There’s people and tasks that suck the life out of us and unless they are critical to my family’s livelihood, I will be saying no to these. Mathew 5:37 tells us “let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No.’ Don’t say yes to things you really want to say no to (may I add here that, you should equally never say no to things you should be saying yes to”). If you suffer from people pleasing, learning to say no will empower you in many ways. Saying no to things that don’t serve us is a path to walk when creating healthy boundaries. Healthy boundaries in relationships, at work, at school, or in whichever hat we are wearing are important for our mental wellbeing.
Plan and Prioritise: Benjamin Franklin has famously said: “If You Fail to Plan, You Are Planning to Fail”. The thing of not planning and prioritising well can hamper on productivity levels in the workplace and affect relationships negatively. Planning and prioritising tasks whether at home or at work will enable us to thrive in what we do. Allocating enough time to a task is also crucial to ensure the success of this pillar. It’s honestly self-sabotage to say for example, I will finish this task within 4 hours, knowing very well what your abilities are and sometimes not taking into consideration, some unforeseen mishaps that may derail your progress along the way.
Prioritising on the other hand also supports you on achieving your goals. When you prioritise tasks, you are empowered to know what is more pressing on your to-do list and with this information, you are able to utilise the time you have wisely.
Tip: I plan and schedule visits and hookups with my friends or family ahead of time. In essence, this is me prioritising my relationships with these people, thus achieving the goal of nurturing these relationships.
Good vibes: If it does not spark joy, bring encouragement, inspire me, then I will step away from it. This applies to all aspects of my life. We all need people in our lives who reciprocate what we offer them (just make sure you are the bearer of good vibes). The same goes for social media and the things we consume. If the accounts you follow on social media do not contribute to where you want to be or who you want to become, then it is time to unfollow, and unlike. If the foods you eat create a hormonal imbalance or upset your tummy, leave them out of your diet (eating plan). Surround yourself with the things that evoke the feelings you want to feel.
Feeling my feet touching the ground does not mean that I will be neglecting myself, opportunities for growth and meeting new people, it is more about zoning in focus on my mental wellbeing. It is about me saying “YES” to myself (showing up for myself in ways I previously struggled to).
For the kind of person I aspire to be, I need to make these changes. But as we know, we are creatures of habit and change doesn’t happen without us being intentional.
Your turn now. Do you have a word or theme of the year? If not, why not?
I would encourage you to strengthen your intentions by asking yourself these questions:
What is your theme or word for the year?
What kind of person do you want to be?
What changes do you need to make to be this person?
What feeling(s) do you associate with the above, i.e. how do you want to feel once these changes are in place?
If you need support to navigate this chapter, don’t delay, book a coaching session with me right now. The first session is on me!