Finding your path: the power of determination and willpower

“Where there’s a will, there’s a way” is a proverb that’s transcended generations, for the most part, echoing the power of one’s will to succeed no matter how challenging situations may be. For me, it reminded me that there is always a way around any difficult season of life. It always gave me hope, restored my faith and helped me not to give up.

However, it wasn’t until recently when I observed a loved one seeping into a depressive state that I understood the depth of this proverb. With each passing day, my loved one doubted their decisions and whether life would get any better. They held unhelpful self-depreciating beliefs about themselves and let worry overpower the joyful moments that existed daily. As I watched closely, the proverb rang louder in my head, prompting me to reflect on “will” and “way”.

The power duo: “will” and “way”

In the context that I am writing, “will” refers to intent, a desire and willingness (to be anything or to achieve what one puts their mind to). “Will” is a matter of choice. The things that we participate or engage in are a result of our will. We choose our intentions, our desires, etc. “Way” simply refers to the means by which the will, is or will be realised. “Way” defines the how, i.e. the structure, method or manner in which the will, will be accomplished.

Many times when we are faced with seemingly challenging situations, it can be difficult to see a way out. To make matters worse, when we are under significant stress, our brains don’t function optimally, making it even harder to see or believe that there is a silver lining. Despite our well-intended efforts towards a breakthrough to change the status quo, we find ourselves stuck in a cycle we can’t break through from. With each failed endeavour, our will to succeed diminishes. From this vantage point, all evidence leads to somewhat, a bleak perspective.  

However, all is not lost.

“Will” requires willpower to be rebuilt and restored. Sometimes it isn’t about having everything figured out or clarity on what the next steps are. “Will” is about determination and when we are determined, we will certainly find a way to maneuver around any tough situation. I believe that determination looks different for each person and at any given point because what we are faced with always differs, requiring us to activate parts of us which lie dormant for too long. Sometimes, determination will look like exercising the muscle of asking for help, doing something that we are afraid to do or sitting still at God’s feet.

For “will” to find “way”, a growth mindset is an important tool to dust out of the toolbox and use vivaciously to your advantage (see image for some differences between a growth mindset and a fixed mindset). The hallmark of a growth mindset is a person that gravitates towards stretching themselves (not giving up) whilst embracing challenges.

A person with a growth mindset displays great persistence in the face of setbacks. They are optimistic, see mistakes as part of learning and growth and appreciates feedback as a positive instrument to help them grow instead of being defensive about it.

“Where there’s a will, there’s a way” is about intentional decision-making. It is important to realise that the proverb can relate to either good or bad intentions. Which is why it is critical to define with clarity what your life’s intention is. To get started, ask yourself these questions:

1.        What do I want to succeed in?

2.        Why is this important to me?

3.        What is currently challenging my will to succeed?

4.        Do I have a growth or fixed mindset?

5.        Which habits do I need to change or adopt in order to succeed?

6.        Going forward, my life’s intention is (complete the sentence).

Whilst we are here and because there is so much to unpack on this topic, let me leave you with some recommended readings below. I picked these books up at different stages of my life, like in 2020 when I was in an apathetic state of being - no will, just me auto-piloting through life (Quiz: which book do you think I read in 2020? :)).

The wisdom from these books has been life-changing for me. They’ve helped me craft a purpose statement for myself and be intentional about the things that I do. On occasion, that loved one is me. Like any other student, sometimes I don’t put into practice their teachings and when this happens, I find myself drifting along life with a void in my heart, until I remember … “where there’s a will, there’s a way”.

Recommended readings:

·      Your Best Year Ever by Michael Hyatt

·      The Year of YES by Shonda Rhimes

·      Start with Why by Simon Sinek

·      The Success Intersection by Pat Williams